Missing Item

My mom goes to coffee on Thursdays with friends. I wanted her to wear her new sweater but I couldn't find it any where. After Mom left for coffee, I started looking harder. I found money stashed here and there but no sweater. After awhile I found it hanging in the front closet where we put outside garments. She can wear it next week.

Eating, Eating, Eating

Before going to my granddaughter's to help her paint her bedroom, I left lunch for my mom in the fridge and a note. The note included the fact that, not only was her lunch in the fridge, but there was pie right under it. When I got home she'd eaten her lunch, a piece of pie AND a lot of Christmas Kisses were gone, the level of the Christmas M & M's was way down and a doughnut was gone. This is all by the same mom who use to eat half a dry English muffin to control her weight.
This reverse of mother/daughter roles is difficult for me.

Mom bowling

Christmas Day

Christmas day went beautifully. We ended up with 8 people and the extra people and noise Mom did really well with. Sometimes she's gone to her room, but not yesterday. She didn't understand that we had exchanged names so most of her gifts were from one person. She also didn't know who the people were who attended. She ate well and seemed to be having a good time. She didn't pull out her word search books, as she's done in the past. It was a successful day and a really nice time.

Mom and I ended the day bowling on our Wii. It's nice to have something we can do together and that she attends to while we're doing it. Don't know how long this will last, but I'm certainly enjoying that time with her right now.

Mystery

Today I followed my granddaughter to a garage to leave her car for repairs. Before I left, I not only left a note but I also locked the door. When I got back home the door was unlocked and there were cookie crumbs leading out the door. Was someone visiting? Did Mom go out eating a cookie? I'll probably never know! Maybe it was one of Santa's elves!

Been There-Done That

Does your "patient" think he/she has been places or seen things that are not possible?
I'm not sure if others run into this or not, but my mother thinks she's been to restaurants with my dad that weren't even around then.
We went looking at Christmas lights last night and she remarked at every one that they always have those decorations up every year. It does no harm and doesn't bother me, except make me wonder if that's a part of Alzheimer's? Any one run into that yet?

December 19, 2009

Had another struggle about taking a shower. When I asked her why she didn't like taking a shower she replied that she didn't like standing that long. (I should mention that the last bath she had we had a terrible time getting her out of the tub.) Luckily a friend of mine had a shower stool she let us borrow. Mom used it. Hopefully that will help her.

A little over 5 years ago, after my father's death, I came to live with my mother. She has Alzheimer's. I am beginning this blog because I realize how important it is to have dialog with others in a similar situation.

First, a little background on me: I've been a teacher, mostly second grade, since 1973. During that time and now I've also been a youth home parent for six 16 year old delinquent boys and a nanny for 3 teenage girls. I have one daughter and two granddaughters. I bought my first home late in life, age 53.

When my dad passed away I decided to give up my home, enabling my mom to stay in her own home, a familiar place for her. It was a difficult decision, but the right one. I still kept my job teaching for another year. I had someone checking on her through the lunch time. That didn't work out as I had hoped so I retired early from teaching.

I'm finding the hardest part of all this, so far, is the changing roles of mother and daughter. I have a difficult time "telling" her what to do, finding where that line is so I can give her as much control as possible but, at the same time, keeping her safe.

The down side at this point is getting her to take showers. The up side is that I bought a Wii and Mom and I bowl for an hour each day. At first I had to tell her what to do each and every time she was up. This went on for about two weeks. Now I just remind her when we start each day and she's got it. She doesn't remember right after we're done, but we are enjoying that time together while we're bowling.

One thing I started for Mom was a photo album of everything we do. I thought it would help her to remember, or at least know, that we've done things. But she doesn't really remember when I give it to her to look at. The photo album is good for me, however, because it reminds me of the good times we are having.

My daughter sent an article to me about playing music from my mom's day. I bought a Frank Sinatra CD and she enjoys listening to that. We are also singing (she hums) to Christmas music.
I'm finding the best times with her are when I go to where she is instead of trying to keep her in the present time. I'm even in the process of changing the photos in her room from the present ones to when she was a child. What joy that seems to bring her right now!